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Monday, January 05, 2009

You've Gotta Have a Plan, Minions

Okay, so I've been giving some serious thought to the coming zombie apocalypse (Procrastinating? Who?? Moi?? why, I never...) and I believe I have a plan. First off, when zombies run amuck, there will be little warning, as the world's governments will either know and not tell us until it's too late or they'll be in denial. That lives little room for preparation, so it's a good thing my house is already stocked with lots of weaponry (mostly of the sword variety). It's also a good thing that I have all the right tools and materials to board myself (and my family) up inside (plus, my husband worked as a carpenter for several years). No mall for me, and no letting survivors camp out at my house. It's every person for themselves when the zombies attack. Now, just so you Minions are prepared...

65%

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40 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

OR OR

Camp out in a mall and shoot anyone stupid enough to think that leaving is a good idea.

Or Walmart.

12:05 PM  
Blogger Heather Brewer said...

Hmmm...lots of malls have Dick's Sporting goods!

12:09 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

RJ, you're idea is pretty good. But what if you go to Walmart or the Mall and it was some kind of zombie Haven?

12:53 PM  
Blogger Camidee said...

Apocalypse? Oh dear, some people talk about that at school that it will happen in the year 2012. Although, I think the only "apocalypse" about it is that by that time all the crazy/idiot/jerky people at my school, are gonna be crazy/idiot/jerky adults and running amuck with no school to hold them back. >_> Although, this zombie thing reminds me of that movie that's made from a game...Resident Evil or something? Maybe we could all watch that and gain a few pointers. ;) Same for I Am Legend and maybe The Happening (just in case it's airborne).

1:15 PM  
Blogger A Dance With Sweet Disaster said...

RJ, totally up for the walmart idea. That store has like...everything. Dick's Sporting Goods is a wonderful idea too, lots of decapitation methods x]

1:30 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Why is everyoen talkign about that today...so strange, 12/12/21 is said to be apocalyspe, but, as quoted, means there is goign to be a new beginning..
Why am i talkign abotu this?
Yeah, with zombies around i am lockign myself in here. i have a computer...sharp objects...idk, a calculater...

Jess

1:39 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm in ur malls, infectin' ur friends! >:D

lol, but seriously now...

I'd go for Dick's Sporting Goods myself. If not for the many available possible weapons, then for the fact that they have air hockey. I love air hockey :D Not much food though... hm.

Also, the apocalypse being in 2012 would kinda suck, since that's the year I graduate high school =/

3:08 PM  
Blogger Heather Brewer said...

AAAH!!! Zombie!!! (heh)

Dude, Air Hockey RULES! Plus, they have freeze-dried food stuffs....

3:10 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

...i need to go to a local mall and try adn find that place! i can't recall if we have one here (and if not i guess i'll go...idk somewwhere else)
That'll be my first year of collage, but then again i don't really believe the apocalspe...or can spell it right

Jess

3:20 PM  
Blogger Heather Brewer said...

Yeah, neither do I......but I do believe in zombies *shifty eyes*

3:28 PM  
Blogger Vampireex3 said...

Hmm i heard an apocalypse would be in 2012 o-o;;
Thats like 3 years! D:
I would be like..o-o 15-17? Oh dang, i wouldnt even be able to graduate from high school O_O;
Nooooo D:
Everyone, run wild while you can! D<

4:02 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey people who are for staying at sporting stores. It is me Ben, a random guy sporting his knowledge of Zombies. During a zombie outbreak teamwork is VITAL. If you are alone the only way to get away from the zombie horde is to run. In numbers you can hold of large invasions and when zombies are inactive in the A.M hours you have more people to search for supplies such as munitions, food and fortification materials. Also malls have many entrances so even though you can get out, zombies can get in. The ideal fortification is a second story of a building with one door by narrow steps and a window. You can defend the door easily, and if your position is overrun, two stories is a relatively easy jumping distance. And Heather! Teamwork is important. Finding a survivor increases your chance of survival. And depending on when you use fire, it may have it's uses. If a zombie is missing an eye, a short burst of flamethrower to the head should effectively destroy the brain stem, the control center of the zombie.

4:02 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

my fav part of the zombie emergency thing is the second one.
"someone WILL get killed, turn into a zombie and the next person to see them will go "Oh, it's my friend, I'll just turn my back and OH GOD WHY IS HE EATING MY BRAIN?!" that's hilarious.

4:34 PM  
Blogger Vampireex3 said...

Haha i agree :3

6:21 PM  
Blogger Vampireex3 said...

Omg, look, i only have 49% chance of surviving the zombie apocalypes D:!

6:22 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Lucky, i got between a 42-45
adn on a survival test i had to take for class i got 'You have a slim chance...if you want to go hiking, go with a friend'...
I'm going to have to have like paddign and a GPS with me all teh time -_-

Jess

7:34 PM  
Blogger Vampireex3 said...

LMFAO XD
Dw, i'd probably fail it even worse xD;

8:32 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

i would hide in sams club i think they have everything i need. It would suck if the zombies could run and i would feal bad for beyonce zombies aren't like they youst to be they would be in cemitaries and moan, and not scream, they would run, they only ate brain and thats the only word they knew “BRAINS” now days they run and jump you but only eat like a little piece of you like two bites and you would turn. they wouldn`t be deformed or be monsters. in 2012 i would be like the matrix when they had all those guns in the bank from SAMS CLUB lol

«(∞,)»

9:01 PM  
Blogger AVL!_VLAD_LOVER! said...

wow..... the year i'll be 15....... and my brothers will be outta the navy!!!!!! Oh. My. Goth. Auntie Heather..... my mom has swords stashed all over the house.... she has them stragically placed.... she says that if someone gets in the house she wants to be prepared to slice open their guts if they try an hurt us...... and let me say something there is nothing scarier then my mother hashing around a large sword...... "I'm NOT EATING THIS CHICK'S BRAIN!" -Zombie


luv AVL...... yeah the swords used to belong to my one brother but when he left she kinda stole em.... LoL

7:48 AM  
Blogger AVL!_VLAD_LOVER! said...

Grrrrrr my mom needs to unblock the site so i can take the quiz thingy.....

luv AVL

7:50 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Yes, but you could block the door. My point was that a large store that's fully stocked with everything you need would probably be one of the best places.

Hm, aren't people just really freaked about the apocalypse being in '12 because the Mayan calender ends that year? What if the Mayan people just got bored of documenting the future of the world and stopped then? HMMM???

I believe in some kind of spectacular end to the world. The one I'm counting on is the one with all the monsters and such from Revelation, buuuuutttt.... we'll not get into that, 'kay?

Yeah, sticking with other survivors could turn out to be either fatal or save your life, depending on the other survivor's nature.

Hey, do zombie apocalypses ever end? Or do people just keep running and shooting 'til they are all killed? I've never seen a zombie movie so I wouldn't know... Which one's are good?

9:27 AM  
Blogger Heather Brewer said...

28 Days Later is one of the best. Night of the Living Dead - the original black and white, of course. Man, there are so many. How could you have never seen a zombie flick?! That's just crazy, RJ. ;)

Minions, Auntie Heather is very pleased to know you all have plans for the coming zombie apocalypse. PLEASE REMEMBER that Zombie is a Minion and should not be "taken care of". :)

9:32 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I have a 61% chance of survival, by the way. Good thing I live outside of the community.

9:32 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey! I kind of wanted to see 28 Days Later, my current favorite actor is in it, you see. But apparently it has the F word in it A LOT.

I'm not a horror movie watcher, I've seen like... the second half of House On Haunted Hill... and that's all that would actually constitute for a horror movie.

9:35 AM  
Blogger Heather Brewer said...

Ah. See, my son Jacob doesn't believe in swearing. But he'll still watch movies with swearing in them. I totally respect that. You gotta do your own thing, follow your own morals.

Which one? The original or remake? The original was best, imho. Vincent Price!!

9:40 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

...swearing in my school is...well, lets say it so common it becomes a habit that i am trying to break...it works great over the summer and during long long breaks...
Anywayz, i get freaked out to easy to watch a complete horror movie thing...although i wouldn't mind seeing them ;)

Jess

9:52 AM  
Blogger Tyhitia Green said...

LOL. I loved thta quiz. I did it a few months ago. I love the guide above it. Priceless.

Happy new year, Heather! I cannot wait to see Vlad on film. :-) It'll happen. I feel it. ;-)

I'll be back more regularly after the wedding and honeymoon in March. :-)

11:08 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Aw darn, I meant the remake!

I'll watch swearing, but my parents won't stand for it.

2:22 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I have a 69% chance of surviving the zombie outbreak

3:24 PM  
Blogger Vampireex3 said...

Niceee XD!

4:41 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Zombies ehh? well that could be a problem and it could help us. Think of all the people that would lose weight just trying to outrun the zombies! But i would hide at Gander Mountain they have a large supply of guns,ammo, and plenty of beef jerky :)=

4:30 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Gander Mountain? Is that a store near you?...
lol, yes, many people would loose a lot of weight

Jess

9:05 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

And the remaining dietitians will rejoice.

9:21 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

zombies are cool but not as good as vampires no but I love the song Astro Zombies by My chemical Romance its so good they are the best and if zombies do attack can't all minions gather and be protected by the one thing better than a brain eating zombie a blood sucking vladimir todd.

4:39 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

cause you know.... We all live in totally different parts of the country (and some people the world :O), so... I'll just have my vampire do it MUAHAAHAHAHAH

7:52 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

i have a 9% chance of survival
i feel so special

7:03 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

That IS special!

7:56 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

That's aweosme.
I told my friend to take this and she got a 50....she always get higher in everything though lol

Jess

5:04 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Just look at it this way one have a good 81% chance of meeting a zombie in person! :)=

9:02 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

35% chance...this sucks. i'm gonna die in such an occasion.

2:28 PM  

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