the current bane of my existence -or- the outline from hell
Outlines. Yeesh. A chapter by chapter description of a book that shows all major plot points in an interesting and organized matter. Sounds easy, right?
For some, it is. For me...not so much. I can do interesting. I can do organized. I just can't do them together in outline form.
Strike that. I can. I just have to work hard at it. Eventually, something will pop into place and I'll see the light. Right? ....RIGHT?!
But, despite how much I'm focusing on DEVON'S PLAYGROUND and its outline, despite being super busy planning my big vampire school dance launch party, despite making plans to hit NYC in May (where I'll be on a conference panel!), despite the happy distraction of some truly excellent personal/family news, I'm still managing to let self-doubt creep in. What if no one buys EIGHTH GRADE BITES? What if I never really go on to publish again? What if I'm a one book wonder, a hack, a nobody?
But that's silly, isn't it? I'm a fairly talented writer. I have the will, the drive to succeed. I'm never giving up. So that should mean that I might possibly be minorly successful, right? ...RIGHT?!
I blame all my insecurities on outlining.
Seriously.
Y'know why? Because I KNOW how much I suck at it, so even when I'm facing it, and not doing too bad of a job at it, I convince myself that I can't do it...which is stupid. Because I can do anything I put my mind to. I've proven that to myself time and time again.
So...what do you Minions blame your insecurities on? Or am I the only one filled with occasional dread?
For some, it is. For me...not so much. I can do interesting. I can do organized. I just can't do them together in outline form.
Strike that. I can. I just have to work hard at it. Eventually, something will pop into place and I'll see the light. Right? ....RIGHT?!
But, despite how much I'm focusing on DEVON'S PLAYGROUND and its outline, despite being super busy planning my big vampire school dance launch party, despite making plans to hit NYC in May (where I'll be on a conference panel!), despite the happy distraction of some truly excellent personal/family news, I'm still managing to let self-doubt creep in. What if no one buys EIGHTH GRADE BITES? What if I never really go on to publish again? What if I'm a one book wonder, a hack, a nobody?
But that's silly, isn't it? I'm a fairly talented writer. I have the will, the drive to succeed. I'm never giving up. So that should mean that I might possibly be minorly successful, right? ...RIGHT?!
I blame all my insecurities on outlining.
Seriously.
Y'know why? Because I KNOW how much I suck at it, so even when I'm facing it, and not doing too bad of a job at it, I convince myself that I can't do it...which is stupid. Because I can do anything I put my mind to. I've proven that to myself time and time again.
So...what do you Minions blame your insecurities on? Or am I the only one filled with occasional dread?
posted by Heather Brewer at 7:17 AM
2 Comments:
ok... the little voice in your head that is always screaming at you that you can't do this and you aren't good enough to do that... you know the voice, right?
Well, here's the truth about that voice: it is not YOU! it is an amalgamation of society, your parents, your friends, your detractors, etc.
YOU DO NOT EVER HAVE TO LISTEN TO THAT VOICE!
In fact, by not listening to it you will be happier and freer. You can recognize the little voice easily enough... every time you doubt yourself or think you can't/shouldn't do something (like writing, outlining, etc) that is your little voice holding you back.
Now, to get around this, you must let me have direct access to that little voice. Have it come up front and center and listen closely to what I have to say....
OK, you in there... S.T.F.U.!!!!!!
(cleaned up for the sensitive and younger readers)
I give you permission to say that (out loud or internally) every time the little voice keeps you from being fabulous and amazing!
OK, so back to our regularly scheduled blogging :)
It is so cool to have Minions who understand. Who GET IT.
As for that little voice, it lives back there with all the other voices, so it tends to be a sneaky bugger. Must. Squash.
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