The Dos And Don'ts They Don't Tell You About
How many writing blogs are there out there? Five million or so? And most of them cover the dos and don'ts of publishing...but they leave out all the really practical stuff. Well, never fear, my faithful minions. Auntie Heather has come to your aid once again. Here are the top five dos and don'ts that all those other writing-related blogs don't tell you about.
5) Don't wear white.
Word to the wise, minions...white stains like crazy. And with all the soothing chocolate you'll be devouring, you want something that will hide stains. Opt for black instead. Besides, as depressed as this process will make you, you'll come to have a great appreciation for the color of mourning.
4) Buy stock in Office Depot.
Or Staples or Office Max--if it's an office supply store, you're going to give them a lot of business, so why not benefit from it? As a side note, it never hurts to get to know the employees' names. After all, to a full time writer, these people are like coworkers...however, please refrain from copying your butt on their copiers. They hate that.
3) Opt for comfort.
I vote for yoga pants or jammie pants (Happy Bunny not necessary if you're not a fashion mogul such as I). The point is that when you're sobbing into your keyboard or glaring at your monitor, screaming, "I HATE THIS! AND I'LL NEVER BE A WRITER!! NEVER!!!", you want to be all sorts of cozy. (Trust me. This will happen.)
2) Headphones are your friend.
Your only friend, considering how much time you'll spend at your desk--but that's beside the point. The only way to block out noise is with more noise. So slap those babies on and block out the rest of the world.
and finally, 1) Surround yourself with inspiration.
I have many things on my desk that inspire me to write. But my favorite has to be my Vampire in a Box kit. Just in case this whole writer thing doesn't work out...I'll always have eternal night to look forward to.
Now, change into jammie pants, grab some chocolate, check your stock portfolio, slip on your headphones, and remember, if it doesn't work out...I've got extra room in my coffin.
5) Don't wear white.
Word to the wise, minions...white stains like crazy. And with all the soothing chocolate you'll be devouring, you want something that will hide stains. Opt for black instead. Besides, as depressed as this process will make you, you'll come to have a great appreciation for the color of mourning.
4) Buy stock in Office Depot.
Or Staples or Office Max--if it's an office supply store, you're going to give them a lot of business, so why not benefit from it? As a side note, it never hurts to get to know the employees' names. After all, to a full time writer, these people are like coworkers...however, please refrain from copying your butt on their copiers. They hate that.
3) Opt for comfort.
I vote for yoga pants or jammie pants (Happy Bunny not necessary if you're not a fashion mogul such as I). The point is that when you're sobbing into your keyboard or glaring at your monitor, screaming, "I HATE THIS! AND I'LL NEVER BE A WRITER!! NEVER!!!", you want to be all sorts of cozy. (Trust me. This will happen.)
2) Headphones are your friend.
Your only friend, considering how much time you'll spend at your desk--but that's beside the point. The only way to block out noise is with more noise. So slap those babies on and block out the rest of the world.
and finally, 1) Surround yourself with inspiration.
I have many things on my desk that inspire me to write. But my favorite has to be my Vampire in a Box kit. Just in case this whole writer thing doesn't work out...I'll always have eternal night to look forward to.
Now, change into jammie pants, grab some chocolate, check your stock portfolio, slip on your headphones, and remember, if it doesn't work out...I've got extra room in my coffin.
posted by Heather Brewer at 5:49 AM
4 Comments:
And never, ever, EVER commit copyright violation with Auntie Heather's blog -- unless you are fond of lawsuits and spanking.
That's a good one too :)
Plus, I think we need to work in taking time out to care for yourself, with things like exercise and Vitamin P (which would be Pepsi, of course).
What about investing in a gel keyboard-wrist-rest? They are good for typing and for saving your forhead when you are pounding it on your desk... ok, so maybe that's only me.
Until I read this post, and followed the link, I had never heard of powells.com... and then I noticed another link on Miss Snark's blog leading to powells.com... think it is time I figured out what I've been missing. I'll be back shortly :)
Heeeeeyyy.....that sure would minimize the forehead bruises....
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